Bored... and upset....

Me:
This partial bedrest thing is getting old really fast. I have probably been doing too many things around the house, such as finishing all the baby's laundry and trying to keep things neat, but it's so boring to just lay on the couch and I feel like such a louse not doing anything. But my body does remind me anytime I've been doing too much, cause I'll start contracting again and I go lay down as soon as I do. I have another appointment on Wednesday, hopefully things will still be normal.

I don't feel like I've grown very much in the past couple of weeks. If anything, I think I look smaller. I guess maybe Vic's just dropping down more and I'm not growing out as much. I'll be posting pictures soon and you can all tell me what you think.

Matt:

Is being absolutely wonderful as always. He has been cooking and helping me with laundry. His mom came down for a few days last week with the crib they bought for us and some of Matt's things from the house. Also the baby clothes that Matt's grandma got for us. So we got to spend a couple of days with her, which I know Matt loved since he doesn't get to see his family as much as he would like. I know everyone always says that you're not supposed to get along with your mother-in-law, but we've always gotten along very well, I think it scares Matt sometimes how much we are alike, haha! Hopefully after Victor is born his family will be able to come down and visit and we can spend some time with them all. So yesterday we put the crib together and vacuumed everything and were putting clothes away and trying to get things a bit more organized.

He was off Saturday and Sunday so we got to spend the entire weekend together! That pretty much never happens so it was wonderful to spend so much time together. In 5 more weeks (maybe less!) we'll cease to be Matt and Heidi and forever be Mom and Dad and as much as we're looking forward to this next phase, it's also nice to spend time just the 2 of us as much as we can until then. Next Sunday is our 1 year anniversary so hopefully we'll be able to spend a romantic weekend together doing absolutely nothing, haha!

My mom:
As of yesterday my mom was getting better. They had had her on a machine to help reduce the fuid that had accumulated in her body. She had lost a couple of liters of fluid and as a result was breathing much easier on her own. She is still on the ventilator but it was "on demand" and only helping when she needed it. So yesterday things were looking much better, they were starting to reduce the sedative as well so she could wake up a bit on her own.

As of today: she now has an infection and is retaining more fluid again. They have had to increase the sedative again because she was coughing and fighting the ventilator. They may try the CRRT (I think that's what she called it) machine again to help get rid of more of the fluid, but they won't try that until tomorrow, because they don't want to overwork her. She is also still bleeding from where they had to open her chest back up. Apparently they have a tube in there to keep fluid from accumulating around her heart again and since she WAS on a blood thinner (she's not anymore) it's still in her system though and they keep having to give her more blood.

It's so frustrating not being able to be there. And yesterday for my dad to tell me how things are looking up and today for grandma to tell me there's another set back.... it's just so hard. My mom always said that if there was anything weird that could happen, her body would be the one to do it. She's had Lupus since she was young, and Diabetes since I was born, so she's been dealing with doctors, medicines and hospitals most of her life. I'm kind of mad actually. She'd been doing fine with her heart valve just the way it was, probably not great, but ok, why did they have to decide to fix it now? It seems like every time she starts to get a bit better, something happens and she's right back where she started. I just wish there was something I could do, I feel so far away and helpless....