Geez!

Sorry it's been soooo long!!! Our computer crashed about 2 months ago and we just got a new one on Monday.

I know this is kind of old news by now at least with my Facebook friends, but...

We are Pregnant!!!! Yay!! I'm due on February 14, but totally expecting to go over at least a week, so the end of February is more likely. I'm 10 weeks now and actually feeling pretty good. I was pretty nauseous there for awhile but it just started to subside a few days ago. thank goodness! I have another midwife appt next week and we should get to hear the heartbeat for the first time. I'm sooo excited about this that I tear up just thinking about it! I can't wait!! Looking forward to catching up with everyone else's blogs soon!

He's got the disease...

Hand, foot and mouth disease that is. Poor kid!!

Sunday afternoon/evening he started getting fussy. We thought he was just tired and he did actually fall asleep early, but then kept waking up. He couldn't seem to get comfortable. Then monday was the same thing, but worse really. He woke up screaming and crying and lasted that way for about an hour before calming down. He didn't want to eat, drink or nurse. He also had a low-grade fever. He really was just not feeling well at all. It took hours to wear him down to get him to finally pass out in my arms. Then he would sleep for 2.5-3 hours and wake up screaming again... and on and on till Wednesday when I noticed he had red, blister-looking bumps on the bottoms of his feet.

Everything suddenly made total sense!! Doing more research into it I discovered that the coxsackie virus that causes HFM has a 4-6 day incubation period and then symptoms start. Those include lack of appetite, general feeling of unwellness and a fever. A couple days after the fever starts the rash breaks out. You can get the sores on hands, feet and mouth or just hands and feet or just the mouth... can even get a rash on the bottom or genital area.

Victor has them on his feet, they are starting now on his hands and has them at the back of his mouth and a rash on his butt :-( Poor kid!!! It's no WONDER he was so miserable the last couple of days!! And there's nothing they can do since it's a virus. Can give him a mixture of Benadryl and Mylanta to help coat the sores in the mouth but that's about it. I've gotten him some go-gurt and stuff to help soothe his throat and so he can eat something! He devoured a tube of it when we first got home. We are pretty sure he got it from the playground and it makes me soooo not want to go back there, ever again!

This picture is not Victor, but it gives you an idea of what it looks like! He doesn't have sores around his mouth (yet anyways.. there are a couple of spots I'm keeping an eye on...) just inside his mouth :-( he does have them on his hands and feet.


It is really contagious for a couple of weeks, from when they first are exposed to when the blisters break open and heal over. So we have about a week left or so until we can be around people again. It's going to be a long week cooped up in the house!!! Hopefully he will at least start to feel better soon!!

Happy Mother's Day!!

Happy Mother's Day to all!!! I remember back when I was pregnant with Victor and someone had the nerve to tell me I wasn't a mother yet. I am here to tell you that as soon as you see that positive pregnancy test, you become a mother. So even if you are currently pregnant, or have a baby in heaven, you are still a mother and this day is for you too! I hope everyone has a lovely day today and enjoys spending time with their families.


Happy Mother's Day especially to my own mother, I love you so much and am so grateful for everything you've ever done for me. I know it wasn't easy for you, especially when I was a teenager, but I never doubted you loved me. Now that I have a child of my own I realize even more what you have always done for me and your family, and I want to say Thank You. Thank you from the bottom of my soul. I love you very, very much. Happy Mother's Day.

aaahhh!

We're alive! I promise! I've totally been slacking and haven't been updating. oops! I actually started a couple of posts that are now totally outdated and not worth posting. I don't have any pictures to post because my computer died, so Matt's computer is the only one we have, and I can't find the cord I need to move pics over from my camera. As soon as I find that I will have TONS of pictures, I promise!

Couple things, Victor and I were oth sick the past 2 weeks, him more than me. Poor little guy, he was sooooooooo miserable! It was his first time really being sick and it was a doozy! He had RSV, a nasty cough that made him throw up at least once a day, usually 2 or 3 times. He was getting dehydrated and we almost ended up at the ER. He had only had 2 wet-ish diapers in a 24 hour period and was very lethargic, was only staying awake for barely 30 minutes before passing back out in my arms. We basically spent several days just laying in bed. He was so stuffy that he didn't want to nurse a lot, or even when he did for a few minutes he would cough more and throw it all back up. We finally got some water into him and he started nursing more and keeping it down and once he did that it was a really quick turn around. Seriously, one day I wanted to take him to the ER and the next he was up and playing and soo much better. What a relief that was!! Of course, then I got the bug and was miserable for a couple of days, but luckily it didn't last as long for me as it did for my poor baby.

In the midst of this he nightweaned himself too! Some of you will horrified when you read this, lol, but we were still nursing at least every 2 hours at night. Thank goodness for co-sleeping and keeping my sanity! But while he was sick he would wake up and not want to nurse and just be cuddled and comforted and put himself back out and for the past week since then he has been sleeping in 8-9 hour stretches! Woo! I knew it would happen when he was ready, without any help from me. I hate that he had to get sick for it to happen, but thrilled that we are here! Hooray for sleep!

I'm also hoping that means my cycle (ya know, that thing your body has to do in order to get pregnant) will even itself out a bit more. I FINALLY got my first period last month, yes, that's right, thanks to breastfeeding I just had my very first post-partum period at 16 months. I was thrilled!!! I thought I had to wean him a bit more before it would finally start but it came on its own! However, for anyone who knows anything about cycles, my luteal phase is only anywhere between 5-8 days, which if you know about this stuff you know that means I have no chance of getting pregnant again until it lengthens out to at LEAST 10 days. So, with him sleeping longer and thus we are nursing less, hoping it will even out my hormones a bit more and I will have a chance at getting pregnant soon!

I am DYING to be pregnant again!! It seems that all my friends are pregnant and I've been itching for more babies for months now. I really wanted to be pregnant again by now, really a few months ago... every month that goes by that it doesn't happen kills me cause it's that much older victor is going to be and that much older I am going to be.... If I want 4 kids before I'm 30 we better Hurray up!

"Is it ever bad to be polite?"

"Is it ever bad to be polite?"

If you have kids, well, even if you don't have kids, please read this, it is very powerful. Is it important to teach our kids ownership of their bodies!

quote for the week

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.

~Franklin P. Jones

The Golden Rule

Treat others as you would like to be treated.

This post has been in the making for a couple weeks now. I've had the idea in my head and have been mulling over and over the best way to talk about my feelings on this subject. Basically, respect is important. We all want to be respected and (hopefully) to be respectful, we also want to teach our kids this. Furthermore, I think we can all agree that the best way to teach a child anything is through example. For those that are religious, even Jesus Christ himself said to lead through example. So why, why, why would we not treat our children with the same respect that we grant to other adults?

I know people here are thinking, "well, because they are children, not adults." But what I believe is that, yes, they are children, but they are also people. My 14 month old is as much a person as your 6 month old and your newborn baby and your grandma and grandpa. Logically, it follows that treating our children with respect, just like we treat those around us, and they will in turn learn to behave with respect. To me, this means that I respond to Victor as though he were already grown and could fully explain to me what is going on. If he has a tantrum, I sit with him and I tell him, "I'm sorry you are upset/frustrated/angry. I love you very much and would like to keep you safe." Or some close version thereof depending on what caused the tantrum, typically it is me trying to keep him from taking something he doesn't need to have. As he gets older I intend to teach him better ways to expend his energy like the pushing game and other great ways that turn bottled up emotion into a game and even a bonding experience. If anyone is interested in learning more about using play to parent and even discipline, I HIGHLY suggest reading Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen. It's amazing.

I also think that the best way to enjoy my time with him each day is to make it as tantrum-free and toddler-friendly as possible. Our house is about 90% toddler proof. The things that he can get to that we can't avoid, we simply teach him that it is not ok to play with. For instance, he loves to touch the garbage can. Gross, I know. But I have yet to figure out a really good way of getting it out of reach since it won't fit in the cabinets. Anyway, he will run over to it and try to lift the lid so he can look inside. At this point I'll say something along the lines of "Mister Victor! could you please put that down? it's yucky!" While I say this I will make funny voices or have the teddy bear/bunny say it. 9 times out of 10 he will put it down and come chase me from the room while giggling madly. I try very hard not to use the word "no" a lot. I prefer to say "No, sir!" or "not for Victor!" while handing him something more appropriate, or if it's more serious, "Please Don't!" or the deadly serious "Mr. Meyers!" I'm hopeful that by avoiding the word "no" as much as possible we will in turn avoid hearing it ourselves as he gets older and more verbal. I also believe that speaking to him with respect will teach him to speak with respect.

I love to play like this with him. I believe playtime is sooo important. Whenever I'm trying to cook, he inevitably pulls at my legs and fusses and fusses to be picked up. Often, I do just that. I know he is just interested and wants to know what I'm doing so I let him see. I've become very good at doing things one-handed. Sometimes when he's particularly hard to please I sill simply stop what I'm doing and sit down on the floor. Doing this and spending just a few minutes playing with him will often re-set him and he will be fine to play by himself again for a little while until I can finish what I was doing.

The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

- Lane Olinghouse

Now, it's not to say I never get frustrated trying to respond to him in the gentlest way I know how. Today for instance; we were playing on the bed getting ready for naptime. He found the remote control for the TV and whacked me in the face with it. Hard. So hard that I was tearing up and my cheekbone and nose were vibrating. I picked him up and put him down on the floor where he couldn't fall down and walked away into the bathroom. I let myself tear up for a minute while I inspected the damage in the mirror. I determined I would live with minimal scarring (hee hee, not even a bruise) and then knelt down to talk to Victor. He was very concerned, he had followed me to the bathroom and I'm sure he could tell something was wrong because he was just standing in the doorway looking at me. He kept saying, "Ma? Ma!" So when I knelt down, I hugged him. I told him I knew he hadn't meant to hurt me and that he had just gotten excited. I apologized that I hadn't removed the item that was not appropriate and asked him to help me remember. Now, I know that this probably sounds silly to a lot of you. After all, he's only 14 months old, he has no idea what I'm talking about for the most part! But I strongly believe, that even at this age he is absorbing more than we realize and as he gets older he will understand and will be able to use it because he's been hearing positive statements/releases for so long.

Children watch the way we react to things and learn from them. If I had started swearing or gotten angry with him all he would have learned is that those actions are acceptable and that that is the right way to deal with anger. By removing myself and giving a second to calm down myself, I was much better prepared to deal with the Respect I wished to show him. I want to treat him this way always. I want to remember that he is a person with real feelings. That just because he can't express them yet, doesn't make them irrelevant. Just because he can't tell me why he wakes up at night, doesn't mean I will ignore it. Just the opposite, I will respond quickly and positively in order to teach him that mommy is there for him. After all, if Matt were crying and calling out for me at night I wouldn't ignore him. The only difference between the 2 scenarios is that my husband can express to me what is wrong and a baby cannot. To me this means that a child's cry must be responded to consistently and lovingly because we have no way of knowing what the child needs unless we are tuned in. And yes, I believe that a snuggle is a need. Don't you ever need a good snuggle?

To me this is respect. Treating my husband, my child and everyone else the way I would like to be treated in return. Some day I hope that all the world will believe in this principle.


~~On that note, I would like to say that before you comment, please remember that these are my opinions and philosophies. This is the way that Matt and I choose to parent and it works wonderfully for us. I understand that many families have different ways of parenting and those methods work wonderfully for them, everyone is different and must choose their own way. This is simply ours. Please respond with respect. Thank you.~~